


On Her Father's Wings

by theoddling



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-typical language, Dad!Hazel referenced, Gen, The Umbrella Academy (TV) Season 2 Spoilers, sort of episode by episode, tags and rating subject to change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:10:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26370124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theoddling/pseuds/theoddling
Summary: What if there was one more thing left in Five’s care at Hazel’s untimely passing? Something more precious than a briefcase, more useful than a tape, and infinitely more infuriating. A smart-mouthed girl determined to pick up where her father left off and help save the world, whether the Hargreeves like it or not.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	1. New Sidekick

Piper Rofa tapped her hands on the steering wheel in time with the radio, waiting impatiently at the mouth of a Dallas alleyway. She had seen the figure matching her target’s description rather unconventionally enter the building at the end of the alley and was just hoping that he’d come back out the same way. She had maneuvered her vehicle so that he would be blocked trying to exit and would have to stop and talk to her, but she also knew from intel that he had ways around conventional means of movement that might make things more complicated.

Still, she jolted up in her seat from where she had slumped while she waited when she saw him appear in the alleyway once more, shoulders hunched and face scowling, as he moved closer to her car, she rolled her head from one side to the other, psyching herself up.

“You must be Five Hargreeves? Please collect your belongings and come with me,” she called in an obviously overdramatic attempt to be sinister, before popping open the door of her ‘Daytona Blue’ Stingray invitingly.

He stopped short, glaring at her.

“I don’t have any belongings. And I’m not going anywhere with you until you tell me who you are and what you want,” the apparently pubescent boy replied with all the authority of an aged general. 

“What about the briefcase?” she pointed out as if it was obvious. And then a sudden horror dawned on her, face falling. “Shit! Am I early? He’s going to be so mad if I’m early.”

“Wait…briefcase? You’re with Hazel?”

“Duh? Didn’t he mention that?” 

“No. In fact, he said he was alone. He said he was done with the Commission and their crap, just keeping a promise to his dead wife.”

A shadow passed over her face. “Yeah, well I’m not Commission, so that part was true. He likes to pretend I’m not working with him, as if that will maaaagically make me stop being involved. Total denial of reality.” 

She bit her lip before plastering a slightly fake grin back on her face. “Anyway, if you know he’s here, he must have given you the briefcase, yeah? Where is it?”

“Some very unhappy Scandinavians with very large guns destroyed it.”

She rolled her eyes. “If those things are so important to the Commission, I don’t get why they’re not made smaller and less conspicuous. Or at least bulletproof.”

“I’ve been saying that for years.” He shrugged, the expression on his face almost pulling into the tiniest of smiles before growing serious. “I’m sorry, but Hazel…they killed him.”

“What?” she scoffed incredulously, only to sober when she realized he wasn’t joking. “No. That’s not possible.” She shook her head vehemently. “Da was among the best the Commission ever had. He wouldn’t have gotten caught with his metaphorical pants down by some mercs in the 60s.” 

Five stared at her in unrepentant shock and disbelief. “Hazel was your father?”

“Yep. Piper Rofa, at your service,” she said, offering a mocking salute, trying to hide her trembling.

He sighed. “Shit.” 

She watched a hundred minute emotions dance across his eyes as she fixed him with a narrowed gaze, even as her eyes welled with tears that threatened to spill.

“Awfully convenient that you survived and he didn’t. What did you do to him?”

“Nothing! I…we had no warning, there was no time…he…I couldn’t save him.”

She growled in frustration, torn between blaming him simply for surviving and trusting him as her father had assured her she could. 

“Look, we look like idiots and are drawing attention arguing through an open car door. And time’s a wasting. Get in the car, and I’ll drive you to the sanitarium. We can have a more detailed conversation about what the fuck happened later.”

“I could just teleport there.”

“You could, but the fact that you haven’t yet tells me I’ve sparked your curiosity enough that you’re not going to just disappear and potentially lose track of me.” She smirked and raised an eyebrow, challenging him to prove her wrong. 

He flopped into her passenger seat, slamming the door behind him.

“Hey, hey. Take it easy on my baby, she didn’t do anything wrong,” the girl scolded, turning the key and swinging cleanly out into the street, laughing as Five rolled his eyes.

“How did you know I was going to Holbrook Sanitarium?” he asked.

“Well you’re looking for your siblings right? The one in the sanitarium is the easiest to track down since he’s not going anywhere.”

He nodded, seeming surprised at her deductive skills.

“Also you’re still holding a newspaper article about him.”

He looked down at his hands, as if surprised to find the paper clutched there. “Hm.”

The pair were silent for a while as she guided the car smoothly and swiftly through the downtown Dallas traffic.

“You’re worried about them,” she observed, not looking over at her passenger. 

“What?” Five asked, startled out of his thoughts.

“Your siblings. You’re worried about them, and about whether you’re going to be able to find them and save them all in time.”

“Of course I am,” he snapped. “They’re my family and the world is going to end in ten days. And it’s my fault they ended up stuck here in the 60s in the first place, scattered and alone. I have no idea how I’m going to find any of the others besides Diego, or if they’re even okay, or how we’re going to stop the apocalypse. It’s all down to me, again.” He waved his hands agitatedly while he spoke, and she let him.

“Well, it’s a good thing you’re not on your own, then.”

He scoffed. “Diego’s not exactly my first choice of sidekick.”

“I wasn’t talking about him,” she rolled her eyes. “Did you think I was just here to be a quick substitute to a taxi?”

“Why would you help me?”

“Because you’re trying to save the world, which you know, is a place I live.” She shrugged. He watched her knuckles whiten as her grip tightened on the wheel almost imperceptibly. “And because you’re trying to save your _family._ ”

He fell silent, catching the obvious implication of her tone. The air in the car seemed to grow heavy as once again neither of them knew what to say. Finally she pulled into the lot and turned the engine off.

“So I’ll just wait here for you to go get your brother and we’ll…figure out a plan from there, yeah?” she asked, an almost hopeful lilt to her voice. 

He found himself surprising them both by nodding. 

“Sure,” he said almost dismissively, exiting the car, being careful to shut the door gently, which brought a small smile to her lips. 

~

“Shouldn’t there be two of you?” Piper asked as Five returned to the car.

“That was a total waste of time,” he grumbled, largely ignoring the question. “He’s right where he belongs. And I’m right back where I started from with no useful leads.”

She raised her eyebrows in surprise. “Well that weird guy with the satellites told you how to find one of them. Do you think he might know more?”

“How did you know where to wait for me?” He turned sideways to study her more carefully. “Why did you wait at that alleyway?”

“Commerce and Knox? Well that’s your protocol when tracking a target isn’t it? Start at a fixed point and work your way outward. The only fixed point you have is where _you_ dropped out of the sky. So I waited there.”

“But how did you know that I arrived at Commerce and Knox?”

She shrugged. “It’s what Dad said. That you…” her eyes widened as something dawned on her. “That you _all_ landed there.” 

“So he knew that would be a convergence point…” Five muttered, clearly thinking rather than talking to her. “Did he say anything else?”

“Yeah, that I should stay out of it and stay away from you because apparently you’re ‘dangerous’ and ‘get people killed’,” she threw air quotes around the words in more a violent manner than Five was used to but she didn’t give him a chance to interrupt, shouting now, as tears welled in her eyes again. “Well look who’s talking now Da?” 

She paused for breath before finally looking back at him. “What was my point again? Oh yeah, your siblings. I don’t really have anything to go on, other than knowing where they first arrived but if you have any more information like dates or hell, telling me what they look like, I can help you track them down.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Are you done?”

“What? Oh, yeah, sorry. I just…needed to get that out?” She smiled sheepishly and he shrugged.

“Whatever. Elliot had photographs, we might be able to make something out from them.”

She nodded, starting the engine. “So you’re really leaving your brother in there?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.”

~

“You can just drop me off,” Five said as Piper guided her car back into the spot it had previously been parked. “I’ll handle things alone from here.”

“Uh, no?” she said incredulously as she tucked the keys in the pocket of her dress. 

“What do you mean, ‘no’?”

She circled the car to stand in front of the man, poking her finger into his chest. “My Dad thought you were worth dying for. His last act was to save your life so you could save the world. I’m not letting you out of my sight until you make his sacrifice worth it.”

Her lower lip trembled and she brushed angrily at the tears forming the corners of her eyes. “So sorry, Old Timer, you’re stuck with me.”

Five felt his heart clench. She was right, he knew she was. But he didn’t know how to work with a partner after so long. And more than that, he felt like he owed it to Hazel – did she have to use the same nickname as her father did? Did she do it on purpose to make him feel more guilty? – to keep his child safe. He stared at the fire in her eyes, melding with the tears she seemed to now be pretending to weren’t falling. He sighed, and turned, headed for Elliot’s loft and assuming she was following close behind.

~

“Elliot,” she said, smiling sweetly and hoping to charm (rather than threaten as Five seemed to have picked as his go-to method) more answers out of the odd man. “You said that the big guy came and went most often. Elaborate.”

“Well…uh…he…” Elliot swallowed nervously, fiddling with his hands. “He came back every couple weeks for a-about three months? He’s stand around calling for Allison, or asking people…for an hour or-or-or so. Then he leaves again.”

“Is there ever anyone with him? Does he walk or drive?”

“I-I-I…I don’t know.”

“Bullshit,” Five growled, leaning menacingly closer and making Elliot shrink with a muffled whimper. “Answer the question or I’ll kill you.”

Piper rolled her eyes with a sigh. “Are the threats helping?” she asked sweetly. “Here’s a hint: the answer is no.”

Five glared at her which only made her smile all the brighter, obviously trying to get a rise out of him. 

“The last few times, he came in a big black car…”

“License plate number?” she asked, fairly certain that a paranoid conspiracy nut like him would have that sort of information. 

The man scrambled up to rifle through a pile of papers on the table. Eventually, he found what he was looking for and rattled off a string of letters and numbers. It was all she could do not to smile smugly over at Five or make some quip about honey versus vinegar. 

“Great. Well Elliot, you’ve been such a doll. I just need one more favor. Can I use your phone?”

He gestured to it as if to say ‘be my guest.’ She smiled, and plucking the paper out of his hand and sauntered over to it, dialing a number.

“Hi, I am so sorry to be a bother, but I just wanted to report…well I think I saw someone breaking into a car. It’s a big black one…” she paused, listening to the voice on the other end of the line. “Mhm. Well I know the license plate number is…” she hesitated, faking uncertainty before she read off the sequence.

“Oh honey, you must be mistaken,” the woman on the other end said. “That’s Jack Ruby’s car. No one in this town is dumb enough to mess with that. Especially not parked outside his place.”

“Oh, of course. My mistake. So sorry again to bother you. You have a lovely day.” She hung up before turning back to the two men.

“I know where to find your brother,” she smiled. “But it’s going to be a challenge getting to see him. This time of day, he’ll be at the Carousel Club.”

“That’s a…burlesque club. No kids or women allowed, except, you know, the dancers,” Elliot proffered hesitantly.

“Well, we’ll just have to break a few rules,” Five said with a smirk. 

“We?” Piper asked, a little startled that he wanted her to tag along.

Five paused. “I meant I. It’ll be easier if just one of us goes.” He explained, his gut twisting when she stuck her lip out in a pout. 

“Oh yeah, of course. I’ll just…see what I can figure out about the rest of your siblings here I guess…?”

He nodded before disappearing in a flash.

“Do you want some coffee? Or I could make food?” Elliot suggested with a nervous smile.

Piper laughed. “That’s sweet, Elliot, but I’m not actually getting left behind.” She kissed his cheek flirtatiously before bouncing cheerfully out the door. “See you later.”


	2. Fathers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers not only for Ep2 (The Frankel Footage) but for BIG REVEALS from later in the season, so read at your own risk.

“So that went well…” Piper drawled, leaning back against her elbows on the edge of the bar.

Five startled, causing her to snicker. 

“How did you get in here?” he asked, sounding less surprised or impressed than she’d hoped and not even bothering to look up from his drink.

“Fun fact, they’ll let anybody in when you’re dressed like a cigarette girl,” she said wryly. “So what are you going to do now? Besides mope into a whiskey?”

I don’t know,” he admitted with a sigh. “I’ve struck out with both siblings I’ve been able to find.”

“So far. But you all landed in the same place, and Elliot said they all went back to the alley looking for the rest of you, so odds are these two aren’t the only ones that stuck around Dallas. Just have to keep looking.”

“And what if I say no?”

“Then I’ll kick your scrawny ass and do it myself.”

He looked up at her finally, surprised by her determination, only to quickly look away again, blushing from her sequined and very revealing outfit. 

“Do you want me to stick around, keep an eye on this brother and see if he leads us to the rest?” she asked, tilting her head to one side.

“No need. He said he thought we were all dead.”

“Cheerful. Could he be lying? I mean he wasn’t exactly thrilled to see you from where I was standing. Maybe he thinks he’s protecting them?”

“Protecting them? From me?”

She shrugged. “Anything’s possible. I mean you are a time-travelling assassin. And I don’t know what family Christmases are like at your house.”

Five sighed in exasperation. “Stay if you want. I’m going back to Elliot’s. He’s still, unfortunately, my best lead.” 

He continued to sip his drink. She rolled her eyes, not liking the feeling of being dismissed. Still, she decided, she may as well spy on his brother and Jack Ruby while she had the opportunity.

Just as she was about to walk away, Five finished his drink, muttering about how their father should have left Luther on the moon as they both watched the larger man “escort out” a drunk. Then he stood, the pocket of his jacket catching on the back of the chair and tearing away to reveal a bulky yellow box. He took it out, staring at it, puzzled. 

“Do you know what this is?” he asked her almost absently, voice sounding like his mind was far away.

“No idea,” she answered, eyes fixed on the label, on handwriting as familiar to her as her own. “It was in _your_ pocket. Why would I know about it?”

“I think Hazel put it there. When he saw those goons get off the bus.”

“Well, it’s probably important then. You should go figure out what it is. I’m going to stick around here and see if I can’t find out a little more about your brother problem."

Five frowned, glaring as she turned the tables, dismissing him for once, but she was already walking away, a cheerful smile plastered on her face as she held out her cigarette tray in question to one of the other club patrons. 

Not long afterward, Piper watched as Luther exited through a back door, and followed, keeping far enough back that he wouldn’t notice, or at least she hoped not. He seemed to freeze, staring as he watched a mystery woman climbed into a car near the payphone out front. Piper couldn’t see his face, but she didn’t really need to to recognize the shock written across his entire body. The woman stared back for just a moment, confusion on her expression evident.

“Vanya,” she heard Luther whisper as the woman shut the car door and drove away.

Luther turned, watching her go, and Piper caught a glimpse of his distress before she ducked back inside to avoid getting caught tailing him. Back inside, she leaned against the wall, biting the nail of her thumb as she debated sticking around to see what other events unfolded for the night and reporting back to Five that she had at least some idea of where another sibling was.

Her decision was made for her though, when an unnervingly large arm pressed across her, pinning her to the wall by her shoulders.

“Who the hell are you?” Luther asked, face mere inches from hers and twisted into a scowl.

“Relax, there’s no need for violence here,” she said, trying to placate him.

“Why are you following me?”

“I’m not. I mean I was. Sort of. I mean it was more general surveillance than ‘following.’ Although it did…also involve following…”

“Shut up and answer my questions.”

“Um, which of those would you like me to do? Because I can’t simultaneously shut up and…speak, which I need to do to answer your questions.” She tilted her head questioningly to one side and put on her most charming smile.

He pressed his arm harder across her collarbones, shaking her, the pressure making it momentarily harder to breathe until she adjusted to it. 

“Quit playing games. Who. Are. You?”

“My name is Piper Rofa. I’m with your brother, Five. A fact that he’s not super thrilled with because of his whole grouchy loner thing, but I’m not about to let that stop me. I stayed behind to keep an eye on you in case there was more you knew or something, even though he’s willing to write you off as a lost cause. Because I’m not about to let the world end based on the fact that your asshole family can’t get their shit together.”

His hold on her slackened, though the arm was still large enough that even slight pressure kept her in place. “I don’t know anything. Until Five showed up, I thought everyone was dead.”

“So that wasn’t your sister in the car?”

“It…was. But tonight was the first time I’d seen her since…”

“Since she blew up the moon and tried to kill you all? Or was that the other sister?”

“No…that was Vanya. How do you know so much about us?”

“It’s a long story. One I’ll happily tell to all of you once you’re rounded up in the same room but I really don’t want to have to keep going over.”

“I’m done with that life.” By now he had released her completely, but she remained rooted in that spot anyway.

“But they’re still your family. Don’t you want to see them?”

“Are they?” his voice was soft, pained. “All I’ve ever done is push them away and hurt them. It’s better for everyone if I just…don’t go back.”

“Bullshit. Family’s hard, but also family’s family. Whatever you’ve fucked up, they still love you. Or at least, the one I’ve met does. You should have seen his face…”

He stared at her, mouth open in shock, face twisted in uncertainty. “How…how many of them are together right now?”

“None. But we can make it at least three, possibly four if you give me that address, and you come with me back to our makeshift base of operations. We still haven’t found Allison or Klaus?” she hesitated, unsure she had the names right. “And the other brother is locked up in an asylum which Five for some reason decided not to spring him from, but that’s…fixable.”

“I’m not going to give you this address. I don’t even know if Vanya actually lives there, but if she does…I don’t know you, no matter what you claim. And I need to talk to her first. Alone.”

Piper rolled her eyes. “Fine, suit yourself. Just, when you’re done, both of you should come to Morty’s Television and Radio.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“I guess that’s all I can ask,” she shrugged. “Now unless you’re planning any other secret sibling reunions or interesting events, I should probably be off.” 

She gave him a wink and wave as she sauntered away.

~

“I can’t tail a car on foot!” she shouted in frustration as Five raged. “And what else was I supposed to do? Fight your brother for the wallet? He could snap me in half like a toothpick!”

“You incompetent…useless…” his face was rapidly reddening. “What is the point of you if you can’t even do a simple task?”

“Hey!” she glared, folding her arms over her chest. “At least we can confirm that she’s still in Dallas. And that she’s either a very good actress or didn’t recognize your brother. Neither of which we’d have without me sticking around, which you called a waste of time. Besides, Luther all but said he was going after her, so we can tail him there.”

“Don’t bother. Let’s just focus on this tape from your father and hope it’s more helpful than you are.”

She bit back the first retort that came to mind, sticking her tongue out petulantly. “Do you have the magic power of film development now too?”

His jaw flexed as he gritted his teeth angrily. “No. I don’t have the power to develop the film. But I’m sure I will find someone who can.”

“Some stranger? When there could be signs, clues, or references to the apocalypse? Great plan. Definitely won’t lead to panic or getting arrested as a terrorist or anything. Especially if you drag them out of bed to do it.”

He sighed angrily. “What would you suggest then?”

“Wait until morning, see where these came from,” she gestured to the photos around the loft. “Until then, do some more research through all this junk to see if we can find where the last two siblings are?”

She watched him struggle with himself, not wanting to admit that she was right. 

“Now pass me that box,” she gestured to a large cardboard box overflowing with sheets of paper and newspaper clippings, clearly things that Elliot thought were important but hadn’t gotten around to sorting into his desk or “conspiracy wall.”

~

Hours later, Elliot shuffled out of his bedroom, setting up a pot of coffee before noticing that the two time-travelers were there, each wrapped in their own heads and oblivious to the world.

“Do…do you like eggs?” he asked them, stammering out an offer for breakfast, cutting through their thoughts. “Or cereal?”

Piper looked up, smiling politely as she accepted and Five waved him off, muttering about “just needing coffee.”

As the girl and Elliot ate, Five looked around again, eyes falling to focus on some of the strange images on the walls. 

“Elliot, did you develop these photos yourself?” he asked, leaning in to look closer at one of them.

“Of course. Can’t exactly drop that stuff off at the neighborhood Fotomat,” Elliot stood, walking across the partition with his bowl of cereal. “Government has eyes everywhere.”

Piper rolled her eyes, half listening as they discussed the lack of darkroom and Five asked him to develop the footage her father had slipped him.

As Elliot began listing supplies and excuses for why they were difficult to get, she rose, moving to lean in the doorway, arms folded.

“Elliot,” Five said, face taught with frustration.

“It’s like five, maybe six hours.”

“Would it go any faster with a sweet ride?” she asked, spinning her keychain, complete with neon orange rabbit’s foot, around on her finger.

Elliot’s eyes lit up at the prospect and Five became distracted by the call over the radio.

“The hell is a code 3-15?”

“Fugitives on the run,” Piper and Elliot said at the same time, glancing at each other in surprise before focusing back in on the rest of the call.

“Oh, Diego,” Five sighed, pressing his lips together and turning his eyes toward the ceiling as if to ask God ‘why?’

“Who’s Diego?” Elliot asked and Piper gave him a puzzled look. 

Hadn’t they talked about it the day before, when he’d shown Five the mugshot? Or was the at least 30 hour day starting to mess with her memory? She shook it off, surreptitiously pinching the flesh of her own upper arm, the quick, sharp pain waking her up some. 

“Imagine Batman, then aim lower,” Five explained before turning away from the radio. 

She snorted at the description, which just about matched up to what her father had told her. 

“You get started on that film,” he told Elliot. “We’ll be back as soon as we can.”

“Actually, it’s probably faster for you to go alone,” she pointed out with a shrug. “I mean you can just pop to him and sort things out without…awkward introductions or sidetracking. Plus, I can get the supplies, help Elliot here; we’ll know what’s on that tape a lot sooner.”

Five hesitated. She flashed him a reassuring smile. 

“I promise,” she said. “We’ll play nice. I mean, I can only hope the feeling’s mutual but I like Elliot, and this is something actually useful I can do. Now go teleport after your crazy-escapee brother.” She waved her hands in a shooing motion and Five rolled his eyes, heading for the door.

“Alright, Elliot,” she said, turning back to the man and planting her hands on her hips in an exaggerated, almost-superhero pose. “Hope you’ve got a shopping list and some cash because I have neither. But I'll drive.”

~

Several hours later, she sighed, brushing hair out of her face as she bent to the task Elliot had given her, focused intently as they neared the finish line. Suddenly, something heavy clumsily smashed into the side of her head and she staggered away from it, dropping her tools and turning, shifting instinctively into a defensive stance to face her attacker.

“Elliot?! What the hell are you doing?” she shouted, watching the nervous little man drop the lamp he had swung moments earlier. 

“I saw the footage!” he shouted. “I know what you are!”

Her head throbbed from the blow. 

“What are you talking about?” she asked, frowning. “What exactly did you see?”

“I saw enough! And I won’t let you get away with it!”

She sighed, uncoiling her fists and trying to be as nonthreatening as possible. Holding up her hands, palms flat and facing him, she locked eyes with Elliot.

“Calm down Elliot, please,” she said, voice trembling almost imperceptibly. “I don’t know what you think is going on, but I promise there’s an explanation.”

“I’m not going to let you warp my mind!” he shouted. “You’re some sort of demon or alien or…or Russian spy!”

“What?”

Rather than responding, Elliot charged at her and swung a wild haymaker, so unexpected (and surprisingly quick) that it caught her off-guard. Striking on the same side he had already hit her, it drove her to her knees, vision swimming. The last thing she noticed as the world fell away were hands on her wrists and her only thought was that she had failed.

~

When Piper woke up next, she was somewhere completely dark. She could feel that her wrists and ankles had been bound together, trapping her in a hunched over position. Luckily, her captor (Elliot she suspected) made the mistake of putting the ropes in front of her, and probably didn’t know about her training in escape artistry. Gritting her jaw against the waves of pain and nausea that her movements triggered, she set to work, among other things discovering that she was in the darkroom closet.

Outside, she could hear shouting, and then, worryingly, the blast of a gunshot. Elliot wouldn’t actually shoot Five…she hoped. Though she also didn’t expect him to knock her out cold and tie her up, so maybe she didn’t know the nutter as well as she thought. And even if he wouldn’t really shoot Five, she couldn’t say the same in reverse if Elliot threatened him. 

Finally, she felt the ropes go slack and stood. 

“Where is she Elliot?” she heard Five ask through gritted teeth.

Her hand stilled momentarily on the doorknob, curious to hear where this would go. 

“The one you left here to kill me when I found out the truth?” she heard Elliot snap. “I took care of her. Bet you weren’t expecting that.”

She rolled her eyes. So dramatic.

“I swear, if you hurt her…”

“Who are you talking about Five?” she heard another voice ask. “Is Allison here? …or Vanya?”

So that must be Diego then. Before things could go any further, she decided to make her grand entrance.

“Christ,” she said loudly as strode casually out of the converted closet, shaking the remaining ropes off her wrist. “That was uncalled for.”

Elliot stared. Diego and the mysterious woman with him stared. Five pointedly avoided looking at her, but she thought she might have caught a flash of relief cross his face.

“Seriously,” she smiled at Elliot who she now noticed was pinned down by the one she assumed was Diego. “That was an impressive punch from such a wimpy-looking guy,” her face fell into disappointment and she held out the rope, “but it was super unnecessary.”

“He managed to take you out with one punch?” Five asked, tone somewhere between mockery and incredulity. 

“I mean, there was the element of surprise. And I think a lamp?”

“I had to do it! You people are dangerous! I know!” Elliot shouted, trying and failing to struggle as the strange woman tied his legs together.

Piper rolled her eyes. “You don’t know shit, Conspiracy Brain. Which would have been obvious if you let me explain instead of giving me a migraine. Now you had better have aspirin somewhere or I am going to be very annoyed.”

“Who the hell is this girl Five?” his brother asked.

“I like her,” the woman chimed in, earning her a glare from both Hargreeves and a smirk from Piper.

“My name is Piper Rofa, it’s really nice to meet you,” she called as she rooted through the bathroom medicine cabinet. “Do you want to explain the rest, Old Timer, or shall I?”

“Rofa…why does that name sound familiar?” Diego muttered.

Piper caught sight of Lila's eyes, narrowed and studying her shrewdly. Something about her calculating look put the younger girl’s nerves on edge and she looked back with the same faux-casual inspection.

“Let’s just watch the film, see what’s got Elliot all worked up, and we can do introductions later,” Five said, brushing aside Diego’s curiosity.

They tied Elliot more securely, to one of the dental chairs he had inexplicably laying around. Lila dug out an old bottle of sickly green nail polish and began doing her fingernails and the captive man’s toes. Piper couldn’t help but chuckle from where she sat with her boots resting up on the corner of the kitchen table; the other woman was really doing a bang-up job of playing the loon.

They all sat in silence as the tape began. And then, realizing what it was, Diego leaned forward with a new intensity of focus.

‘He really is obsessed with JFK,’ she found herself thinking. ‘Professional interest or crush?’

“How do you have this?” Diego asked his brother.

“Hazel died to get me this footage,” Five explained, eyes flickering to his brother, and then to Piper who tried to hide her distress behind a blank mask, before turning back to the projector screen. “It must be the key to stopping doomsday.”

“It had better be,” Piper muttered. 

“Hazel?” Diego said with an accusatory frown.

Piper stiffened, swinging her legs down to the floor. She did not want to deal with a confrontation right now when her headache was finally going away, but she wasn’t going to stand for anyone disparaging her father’s memory either.

“Long story,” Five said dismissively, still focused ahead of him.

“What’s doomsday?” Lila asked, looking pathetically up at Five from her seat.

“Longer story.”

“What exactly did he say to you?” Piper’s eyes flickered to Five’s face, equally curious for his answer as his brother was.

“Well he was killed before he could explain. But whatever he wanted us to see, it’s on this film.”

Her teeth found the middle knuckle of her thumb, biting down on it gently while she wracked her brain for something her father might have told her that could help, feeling useless. How could she claim to have known him, to be his protégé or fill his shoes if she didn’t even know what he died for?

Four sets of eyes flickered determinedly over the screen as chaos unfolded, only Lila looking away, confusion and fear on her face as she instead watched the watchers. Suddenly, Five muttered something under his breath and moved to rewind the tape, shifting the projector around to change the focus. Whatever he saw, Diego noticed the second time around, hesitantly unfolding himself from the countertop, mouth hanging open as he approached the screen in shock to get a better look. Elliot meanwhile, was thrashing about and struggling in his chair as if he still thought he could get away. It was distracting, and for a brief moment, Piper considered the lamp and returning the favor just to get him to calm down. 

“This can’t be,” Five said, his focus fixed.

“Okay are you going to fill me in now?” Lila snapped. “What the hell is this shit we’re watching?”

“No that’s impossible,” Diego’s statement might have been a denial but his face seemed to say that whatever the realization the two Hargreeves had come to, it was as plain as the hair on their heads now.

“Clearly it’s not.” At least Five had the decency to sound awed at the new information.

Information Piper still didn’t understand.

“What…what is it?” Elliot asked from around the makeshift gag in his mouth.

The two remained transfixed on the grainy image in the center of the room. 

“I gotta say I’m with Lila and Elliot on this one. You two might recognize the mystery blur, but the rest of the team’s,” she gestured around, “in the dark.”

“Dad…” they both said softly. 

“Oh shit.”

To call what followed a discussion would have been giving far too much credit to the participants, and vastly underplaying the childishness of their sniping at each other. 

“No, you’re jumping to conclusions,” Five said, pacing back and forth. 

“What the hell else is he doing standing on the grassy knoll, holding an open black umbrella, on a sunny day, in Dallas, the exact same moment the president gets shot?” Diego shouted, gesticulating wildly at the screen. 

“It doesn’t look good, I admit,” Five snapped back.

“I mean your father clearly had a thing for umbrellas, given the academy, tattoos, etc. so that could be nothing,” Piper drawled, inspecting her nails as the brothers went around and around in circles, physically and metaphorically. “Or it’s for shade, and maybe he’s there to watch or meet the president, like everyone else in Dallas? He’s not a supervillain, right?”

“You think it’s a coincidence? No. He’s the signalman for the whole goddamn thing.” Diego turned to face her, eyes ablaze. “And what would you know anyway? Who the hell are you?”

“I told you. Piper Rofa. I’m…a friend.”

“Bullshit.” From seemingly nowhere, he had drawn a knife, pointing it at her threateningly. “I saw your face while we were watching the footage. You know something.”

“I wish I did! I wish I could answer your questions or villain monologue or whatever it is you’re looking for. But I don’t know jack, except that the world is ending. It might be connected to Kennedy, it might not.” She shrugged, slapping her hands back down to her sides. “My father is dead, and he told me that The Umbrella Academy were the best chance at saving the world. So get your stupid knife out of my face, and figure it the hell out.”

“Who…?” Diego looked momentarily taken aback. “Who’s your father? How does he know about us?”

“Piper, don’t,” Five cautioned. “Now is not a good time to be bringing that up.”

She sighed, turning away from both of them and folding her arms around herself. “Hazel,” she admitted softly, almost apologetically. 

She thought she heard Lila gasp and frowned at that, but there wasn’t time to address it as Diego seized her shoulder and slammed her into the nearby doorframe.

“Your father killed my…friend,” he hissed through clenched teeth, knife pressed to her throat and face in hers.

She rolled her eyes, undaunted. “Oh cry me river. Good people die all the time. Besides, that’s in the past…or the future? And I’m not him. Nor will killing me do anything, other than make a mess of this lovely apartment and delay what’s important. So can we focus back on your dad, who you apparently think is just as bad or worse than mine?”

He growled, pressing the blade harder into her neck, enough that she felt a thin trickle of blood, clearly not taking kindly to her opinion on the matter.

“Easy Diego,” Five interrupted, placing a hand on his brother’s arm and drawing him away.

Piper rubbed at her neck and shoulder where the majority of Diego’s weight had been, adding them to her growing catalogue of bruises to expect. 

“Seriously,” Five sighed in exasperation.

“No, it makes sense,” Diego insisted, shifting instantly back to the topic of Reginald Hargreeves and JFK as if there had been no interruption at all. “This is what Hazel was obviously trying to tell you.” 

His eyes flickered over to Piper and she shrugged. Lila stood up, offering to help her with the wound and hesitantly she accepted, both women leaving the brothers to argue.

“We have to stop dad from killing the president,” Diego declared dramatically. 

Piper rolled her eyes and caught Lila doing the same. She frowned. There was something about this woman…something that set her teeth on edge but felt very familiar.

“Do I know you?” she asked.

“No. I don’t think we’ve met,” Lila answered with a smile that seemed to waver uncertainly. “But I can tell we’re gonna be good friends.”

Piper bit her lip, wanting to say more when Five’s voice cut through again.

“Dad’s clearly in Dallas, right? Let’s just go talk to him. Maybe he can help us fix the timeline.”

“That sounds like a terrible idea,” Piper muttered, brushing aside the rest of Lila’s first aid to return to the main room in case she had to referee between them.

“Dallas is a big place,” Diego pointed out. “We need to find him first.”

“Gee, if only we had some magical, old-timey way of finding people and their addresses.”

Piper tossed the October 1963 phone book at Five, “Or should I pull another fast one on the 911 operator?”

He dropped in on the table. “Let’s start simple, his name.” 

Before he could, Diego had already opened the book and bent over it, scanning for ‘Hargreeves’ with increasing frustration. When they didn’t find it, Five suggested looking for his company instead.

“D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Co.”

“Yeah, I know the name,” Diego shot his brother a look.

“Seriously, more umbrellas? I think it’s time to consider it was a fetish,” Piper joked, drawing a laugh from Lila and a disgusted shudder from Diego. 

When they found what they were looking for, the two almost immediately turned to go, rolling up the screen and heading for the front stairs down into the showroom. 

“He okay to leave here like that?” Diego asked quietly.

“Yeah, he’s fine. What about the girl?” Five answered.

Both men looked behind them to find Elliot, still tied and gagged, and Piper flipping aimlessly through a magazine, once again leaning back in a chair and resting her feet on the table, making it all to obvious that she was eavesdropping. There was no sign of Lila.

“Shit,” Diego muttered, turning back.

Five sighed. Piper pointed over her shoulder to the darkroom closet Lila had scurried off to as soon as their backs were turned. He sat down across from her while Diego went to check on the other girl.

“Are you coming with us?” he asked, eyebrow raised.

“No. I think I’m going to stay here. We still need to find the rest of your family as fast as possible, and I have a few ideas. Plus something’s not quite sitting right with me that I want to follow up on. And I don’t think your brother likes me much.”

Five chuckled. “Diego doesn’t like many people.”

“He likes _Lila_ a hell of a lot. You sure that’s not going to be a problem?”

“No, I’m not. But it’s one we can deal with later.”

She sighed, fidgeting with her hands on the table. “You wanna take my car?”

His expression softened, understanding the gesture of trust it was meant to be. 

“No, I don’t want to draw attention.”

She raised an eyebrow. 

“It’s a very flashy car, Piper.” The tone of his voice sounded almost like a scolding father, or like her mother’s not-quite-disapproval when she’d cut the picture out of a magazine and pinned it to her corkboard at fifteen. It made her smile sadly, rubbing at the sting of loss she hadn’t let herself feel completely yet.

Diego emerged from the cupboard, Lila following behind a few moments later.

“You three play nice now,” Five said, faux-sternly. Diego turned to him, surprised, but his face was blank, showing no sign that he might have just made a joke. “We’ll be back soon.”

~

Piper waited until Five and Diego had been gone for some time, and until Lila had finished painting Elliot’s nails, in case things went south – it would be rude to leave him with only two thirds of a mani-pedi after all.

“We need to talk,” she said sternly, setting aside the article she had been reading and sitting up to face the other woman, arms folded across her chest.

“About what?” Lila’s tone was the epitome of innocence and Piper found herself impressed. She was one hell of an actress.

“You’re Commission right?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Lila frowned in confusion.

Piper scoffed. “Oh please. My father was a Field Agent til he met Mom and settled down. But you knew that.” She cocked her head to one side in question, inviting Lila to deny it again. “He taught me how to spot another agent, in case they ever decided to use us to force him into un-retirement or something.”

Lila tensed, body movements subtle but still there, noticeable to a trained eye like Piper’s as she got ready to attack.

“You can relax,” Piper sighed, waving a hand in the air dismissively. “You don’t get in my way, I won’t get in yours. Or rat you out.”

“And what if our missions are incompatible?” Lila’s eyebrow quirked, finally dropping her ‘scared little crazy girl’ act completely. 

“Still no reason to bring extra parties in. If it comes to that, we settle things the old fashion way, and may the best woman win.”

The two women locked eyes, sizing each other up, baiting each other. The air practically crackled with electricity. Elliot, still bound and gagged and distinctly uncomfortable, tried to mumble something as his eyes flicked frantically from one to the other. Surprisingly, Lila broke the stare first. 

“Yeah sure, I’ll agree to that, at least for now.”

“Excellent,” Piper smiled wryly. “Like you said, I can tell we’re gonna be good friends.”


End file.
